Building Relationships We Can All Be Proud Of

Saturday, 16 March 2013

Our New Slave Master....S.E.X.


I BELIEVE there are a lot of people engaged in premarital sex who are not doing it as a matter of need-to-do-it. There are some too who are in it because they have had it drummed in their ears over and over again how they (the boyfriends or girlfriends) can’t live without sex and therefore becomes a more of ‘it is sex or break-up Kind of thing. I am not here to judge anyone but this I can tell you; if a man or woman you are dating makes it clear to you, either through subtle means, or in a frank manner that they cannot date you if you do not give in to sex, or that they cannot see how they can live for a month or more without sex, you should be on the watch out or better, just end the relationship.

The reason is quite simple and pretty much logical. What the person is saying is that for as long as you are with them, whether they are still dating you or married to you, they cannot go without sex, and therefore you cannot or they cannot travel for a long period of time and still expect their fidelity and you cannot be sick for a prolonged period of time neither can you have complicated-in-and-out-of-hospital kindda pregnancy which may demand that sex is halted for a while…. (It may sound overly simplistic...if not preposterous but guess what, the simple things/reasons are the very things that ruin relationships)

Love is beautiful and anyone who is truly in love respect the decision of the other person including their choice to stay without sex whether it is for moral reasons or for religious reasons; and by this I mean PREMARITAL SEXUAL ABSTINENCE NOT STARVING YOUR PARTNER AS A MARRIED PERSON. I believe that no one should use the love someone has for them to blackmail them into changing their opinion about what they feel is right or wrong.

You cannot claim to love me when you are asking me to do the very thing that will kill something in me and put a smile on your face… Something, the denial of which can make you walk away from me. If they will walk away from you when you deny them, it mean getting it means a lot to them and no matter the love they have for you, they cannot stay without it. Do you agree then with me that you should also love yourself enough to say ok, you can walk away because I also love myself so much to let you have it.

And I am not saying this for only those who have not been active; I am saying this too for all those who are being made to use sex as the signature ink to sign in a relationship and the ink for signing regular renewals. I know someone reading this is struggling with sex enslavement and wish they could break out and walk out. Well the choice is yours. Someone is manipulating you and you do not see it because they make it look like you are wicked to deny them….well guess what…they are as well wicked to insist.

~PG Sebastian~